Oh empty page, what terrors and wonders do you hold? Do you know how scary it is to put these thoughts that swirl in my mind and heart onto the white of this page? The fear that like a fall leaf, they will wither and die on this cyber-space catches me and holds my fingertips captive.
What is it really that so scares me? Judgement. Being misunderstood. Even applause. Because I know only too well the thoughts that might run through your head as you read these thoughts. Really? She does THAT?! Or Man, I wish I could do that/did that/felt that way… I know these thoughts well because that is what I think, how I react. On Facebook, reading articles, seeing pictures. This cyber world provides just enough closeness with just enough distance to make judging others and judging yourself oh so easy. Sometimes it happens simultaneously!
Maybe I am alone in these thoughts. In the spirit of honesty, I struggle not to compare myself with my dear friends and co-writers, my fellow adventurers on this journey of motherhood AND confession that is blogging. Lacey, as the mother of three, my former college roommate, and just an all-around brilliant woman has had my admiration from day one! Younger than me by a few years, she blows me away with her talents, boldness, and full personality! I met her with tiny silver cameras dangling from ears and was instantly intrigued as she told us about her passion for photography and media in general. She now excels in baking, eating healthy, creating a fun schedule for her kids, and helping her husband lead youth group for the past six or seven years. Meeting Kelsey was a relief as I found a fellow “older student” in her. My hopes of feeling better about myself were quickly dashed as I found out what she had been doing between high school and college: just being a missionary to Africa for over a year! Now she has a daughter and is pregnant with a son, while pursuing her Masters, hiking, volunteering for single moms, and creating a homeschool curriculum for her 2 year old.
Knowing I can’t top any of these remarkable traits in my dear friends, I stand in awe–often intimidation–and wonder: what do I have to offer people like this? People like YOU? So full of talents, creativity, self-discipline, and accomplishments?
The answer? Friendship.
That is all I have to offer Lacey and Kelsey, and now, we offer it to you. Not comparison- though that might come up, fight that urge with me (watch this video for more thoughts about mom comparisons). Not guru-wisdom- though, as true friends, we will share any hot tips we have to give (see the bar on the right) or recent revelation that gave us hope for the week (check our posts Monday, Wednesday, and Fridays!).
Share your tips and revelations with us too!
We want to be better together. Not alone or broken-pretending-to-be-perfect. Just us moms sharing honestly with the purpose of friendship.
With that in mind, check out this video about how hard it is to find Mom friends…made me laugh- so true!
Much love, New Friends!